Been walking a lot these days...down the unfamiliar yet familiar road of memory. Some people don't get it. The question it and ask for explanations. I can't offer any. I don't want to offer any. I'm being judged. By the ones I don't expect to be judged by. How can it be wrong when it feels so right?

     Years rolled by and so did the tears and the laughter. We just to cry and laugh together and then we stopped.   Is it strange that now perhaps I want to laugh and cry with them? I love this warm fuzzy feeling inside which I thought I had lost. It's like finding a bit of me that was lost. I love going down that road. It isn't the same road or the same hand I held then but it isn't unfamiliar either. It's the ghost of christmas past in the present leading me into the future and I want to be lead. I want to be lead by them. I know that I'm in safe hands again. I hold onto them, promising to never let them go again. I have found me again. Suddenly at a loss of words. How can one put into words this feeling in the pit of my stomach which is slowly spiraling to my heart? I think somewhere I gave in. Insane bursts of joy and love. I'm aware of life. 

      You have done so much in such short time. You saved me from potential disaster. You breathed life into me again. You redefined so many things in my life. Am I stupid and presumptuous by wanting to jump in? Hang on... I already did. But the beauty is that I'm no longer sinking. Thank you is not enough. You will not understand what I am thanking you for but nevertheless I thank you. I let go of my safety net. I don't need one anymore. 

     Thank you P, R, U. Sorry for coming in late. But I'm so glad I came...