Keeping up with new year resolutions is a farce. I find it easier to say I have a to-do list. Checking off stuff on last year's list was a thrill...all done save one. Not bad for someone who is supremely lethargic. This year's list should be a little more challenging I thought...how else to push myself??? 10 days down and so far the year has been great. Reason for this post...it's on my to-do list. MUST BLOG ATLEAST ONCE A MONTH!!!! Doesn't sound like much but considering how far apart I write, maybe this way I won't forget how to.
The Delhi winter rages on yet this year I don't feel the whiplash of the biting cold breeze. Makes me wonder...does this mean that I've become accustomed to it? Have I then become a Dilliwali?? I remember last year how vehemently I said Kolkata is home and I'll never be anything but a Kolkattan but a year and 2 months down the line, it's not so bad. This is home too. I belong here too. Maximum growth happened here. In the last year I saw a sea change in my general outlook to life and myself. The loneliness has given way to comfort and belonging...and it feels right. Perhaps I'm being a little presumptuous about being in love here but as a wise person once told me...we need to live a little. Without risks and letting go, it's a stagnant place. And I refuse to be stuck in a rut. And besides I have enough cushions lying around to break my fall. Some acquired over the years, lending a soft, familiar feel to my being. Some freshly collected, firm and strong even though they're not well broken in. But cushions nonetheless.
I've stopped struggling. I don't need to. Finally. Closure.
I get a good feeling about 2012...don't usually have an opinion of a year so early on...but this time, I feel it in my bones. This shall be a year of laughter, joy, love and life like I have not known it before. It seems very cliched and trite but such is life :P
I read a Browning poem this morning, something I had read long ago...somehow it made more sense now.
The Delhi winter rages on yet this year I don't feel the whiplash of the biting cold breeze. Makes me wonder...does this mean that I've become accustomed to it? Have I then become a Dilliwali?? I remember last year how vehemently I said Kolkata is home and I'll never be anything but a Kolkattan but a year and 2 months down the line, it's not so bad. This is home too. I belong here too. Maximum growth happened here. In the last year I saw a sea change in my general outlook to life and myself. The loneliness has given way to comfort and belonging...and it feels right. Perhaps I'm being a little presumptuous about being in love here but as a wise person once told me...we need to live a little. Without risks and letting go, it's a stagnant place. And I refuse to be stuck in a rut. And besides I have enough cushions lying around to break my fall. Some acquired over the years, lending a soft, familiar feel to my being. Some freshly collected, firm and strong even though they're not well broken in. But cushions nonetheless.
I've stopped struggling. I don't need to. Finally. Closure.
I get a good feeling about 2012...don't usually have an opinion of a year so early on...but this time, I feel it in my bones. This shall be a year of laughter, joy, love and life like I have not known it before. It seems very cliched and trite but such is life :P
I read a Browning poem this morning, something I had read long ago...somehow it made more sense now.
Round the cape of a sudden came the sea,
And the sun looked over the mountain's rim:
And straight was a path of gold for him,
And the need of a world of men for me.
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